Desert Love
by BlueStar137
Summary: an odd love story full of complications and a load of looneys! :  R&R
1. Odd Calls

"Hey Daff, you better hurry up! We are gonna be late doc!" exclaimed Bugs.

"Yeah alright, stop wetting your knickers! I'm coming!" the duck replied, as he jammed the last of his clothes into his small suitcase.

Bugs and Daffy were quite excited. They were going to meet Wile E Coyote's girlfriend. Yes, that's right! Wile E Coyote has a girlfriend! You see, Wile E was always the quiet one, the kind of guy who seemed to be more interested in his geeky gadgets rather than the girls. Bugs and Daffy seriously did not think he would ever get the confidence to even talk to a girl, let alone get a girlfriend!

It was only a few nights beforehand, in which Wile E had rang up Bugs and told him the good news. However, Bugs could not help but feel a little curious and concerned. The coyote did not exactly sound elevated. In fact he had sounded rather scared on the phone. His voice was shaky, and his words muffled, and the moment Bugs suggested that he and Daffy came to visit the coyote with his new girl, Wile E shrieked. From Bugs' perspective, it certainly did not seem like a shriek of excitement, gosh no, rather a shriek of sheer bloody fright.

However, after Bugs had talked through these odd events with his good friend, Daffy, they both concluded that Wile E had always been the nervous type and it had never taken much for him to have a complete fit over something.

"Hey Daff, you better set up the sat nav, we have not been to Wile E's for ages," suggested Bugs, as he got into the driver's seat of his Jeep.

Daffy, slumped in the passenger's seat, pulled an extremely offended face at his friend. "Err Bugs, aren't you forgetting, I am one of _the_ best map reader's in the world. Don't you remember I won a _golden_ certificate for my orientation skills in primary school?"

"And that was like….twenty years ago?"

"I still won that golden certificate didn't I?" snapped Daffy. "So, I think it's safe to say that we will not be needing the sat nav because I can do a much better job!"

"So…are you seriously suggesting that you can find your way around the desert without getting even a little bit lost?"

"Yes Bugs, that's exactly what I am suggesting!"

"Daff, are you sure…"

"Golden certificate Bugs! Just keep reminding yourself of who won that golden certificate."

Bugs rolled his eyes. There was no point in arguing. So instead, he started the engine, pulled out of his drive and their long journey began.

"Oh, I am bored! Are we there yet?" groaned Daffy.

"We've only been driving for thirty minutes!"

"That's long enough to get bored!"

"Surely_ the_ world's best map reader should never get bored. Boredom is not golden certificate worthy."

Daffy shot an evil look at his friend, whilst Bugs just smiled back. "Just pull into the next service station will ya? Nature's calling," ordered the duck.

It took another half an hour until Bugs pulled up, although there were plenty of earlier service stations he could have stopped at, he enjoyed winding up Daffy and seeing the extreme desperation on the duck's face. Daffy now really needed to use the toilet, a few minutes longer, he would have burst.

Bugs could not help but chuckle at the sight of his friend rushing into the service station shouting "Where's the loo, I need the loo!" Whilst Daffy was inside, Bugs got out of the Jeep and had a short ponder around the woods surrounding the station. He was very happy it was the summer holiday, as working at Warner Bros. Studios was hard work, especially as he was one of the main faces of WB. The summer break was well deserved by all and Bugs was looking forward to seeing Wile E, as he and the coyote generally do not see very much of each other in the studio. However when they did talk, they usually got on well.

As Bugs was in deep thought, the high pitched ringing tone from his mobile began. He glanced down to see _'Road Runner Calling'_ flashing on and off on his screen. Bugs answered, "Road Runner! What's up doc?"

Road Runner laughed, "Bugs, you have to stop saying that outside of work, you don't hear me say _'Beep Beep'_ all the time."

"Well, you know me Road Runner, I like to rehearse my lines 24/7."

There was slight laughter and then a pause from the other end of the line. "Road Runner? You still there doc?"

"Bugs, can you do me a favour?" replied Road Runner eventually.

"Yeah sure, what can I do for ya?"

"Please don't call me Road Runner, I really hate the name."

Bugs was a little surprised. "Oh ok doc, then what shall I call ya?"

"I'd like it if you called me….Damian."

Bugs nearly burst into laughter, but realised from Road Runner's tone that he was being utterly serious. "Err, ok doc…whatever you say."

"Thanks Bugs, I knew you'd be cool…I assume you are going to meet Wile E's new love?"

"Yeah, wouldn't miss it for the world."

"Cool. I am going to, so I guess I shall see you later. Thanks again Bugs."

"Sure, no problem…Damian." After Bugs' words, Road Runner hung up, leaving the bunny completely mystified about the conversation that had just occurred.

Road Runner was perhaps the most loved cast member at WB studios. His real character was extremely different to his goofy bird whose only lines were _'Beep Beep' _on , Road Runner was such a gentlemen. He was kind, polite and never said a bad word against anybody. He always presented himself well and never turned up late to anything. His voice was low and very soothing and he spoke with such clarity and diction. Best of all, Road Runner knew all about his qualities, yet he never bragged, simply because he was secure and happy with whom he was. All the girls wanted him and all the guys wanted to be him.

After all these years of thinking that Road Runner was completely content with his own identity, coming to realise that he was actually very unhappy with his name seemed awfully strange to Bugs.

"Ahh that was so much better!" announced Daffy at the top of his voice. "Glad I got that out of my system." Daffy had returned from his loo break and was approaching Bugs.

"You washed yer hands didn't ya doc?"

"Of course I did!" There was a short pause, as Daffy pondered at his friend's expression. "You okay Bugs? You look a bit puzzled? Are you worrying about my map reading skills? For the last time Bugs I told ya, I won that golden certificate for a good reason…"

Bugs cut in. "No Daff, it's not that. I just got an odd call from Road Runner."

"Road Runner? What does he want?" spat Daffy, who was extremely envious of Road Runner.

"I'll tell you in the Jeep. We'd better get goin' we still got a way to go."


	2. The Journey

"Damian!" laughed Daffy. "Road Runner wants to be called Damian!"

"I know, that was my reaction," replied Bugs.

"Finally, I have found something to laugh at about Road Runner."

"Daff, I know calling him Damian is a little bit odd, but we really should be supportive of Road Runner. If he wants to be called Damian, then that's fine, we shall call him Damian because we're his friends."

"You see Bugsy boy, that's where you are wrong! Road Runner and I are not friends, we are enemies!"

Bugs lifted an eyebrow. "Is that true doc, or do you just like to think that's true?"

"Of course it's true, why would I make that up?"

"Because, I hate to say this doc, but you are a drama queen. You like to create drama when there is no real drama going on. It's like some weird drug for you."

There was a moment of awkward silence before Daffy replied. "Hmph! Drama queen maybe, but I ain't a man hoar that's for sure. I don't sleep around like you do."

Bugs sharply turned his head to his friend with blazing eyes. "And what exactly is that 'sposed to mean doc?"

Daffy rolled his eyes. "Oh, don't give me that Bugs. I know you're a randy man. You, quite literally, go at it like a bloomin' rabbit!"

"Whoa! Now hold on Daff! That's a little insensitive of you to say, don't you think?"

Daffy shook his head. "Bugs, answer this to me honestly, how many of the women have you had from WB studios?"

Bugs was about to protest against the question, but unconsciously a devious little smile began to creep up on his face.

"Ha! I think that dumb little grin of yours answers my question," remarked Daffy.

Bugs sighed. "Daff, I'm not as bad as you think, alright doc? And don't you dare go thinking that I creep around behind Lola's back. I know I've done it to other girls, but I would not do it to Lola."

There was another moment of stifling silence in the air. Daffy rested his head against the car window and looked out at the baron of the desert. There were a few cacti and the odd tumbleweed, which was pretty much it.

"Do you love her?" asked Daffy, still keeping his eyes upon the landscape.

Bugs felt his body go tense. He had never been asked that kind of question before. Although his relationship with Lola was the longest he had been in, he did not know if he loved her. Heck, he was still young, he wanted to enjoy life, and he did not want to worry about love just yet.

Daffy broke his gaze from the window and peered over at the bunny. "Well…do ya Bugs?"

Bugs sighed. "I don't know Daff, that's a big question to ask someone."

Although Daffy was quite an annoying and insensitive character, he did have his limits. Though he disagreed with Bug's carefree attitude towards women, he knew that right now he was touching a very sensitive area. Therefore he decided to shut his beak.

* * *

><p>Lola woke up. It was ten in the morning and the bright, warm LA summer sun was piercing through the window. She stretched and rolled over to find the bed space next to her was empty. However this was no surprise, Bugs had said he was leaving early in the morning with Daffy.<p>

She rubbed her eyes and rolled back over to her side, suddenly realising a note left beside her lamp. It was Bug's handwriting and it read:-

'_Good morning cutie. Hope you had a nice sleep, be back tomorrow, stay out of trouble'_

_Much love_

_Bugs_

_x_

Lola was a down to earth girl and was not really into all this 'lovey dove' crap, but she could not help but smile at that cute little note. She wanted to ring Bugs, but decided against it. She guessed that he'd probably be driving right now, so she did not want to distract him.

Instead, she rang up one of her closest friends. She felt she could do with a bit of company.

* * *

><p>Road Runner was driving his Mercedes along the desert road. He too was visiting Wile E. Suddenly his phone began ringing. He glanced down to see that it was Lola calling, so he pulled over and stopped to answer it.<p>

"Hi Lola," he chirped.

"Hey Damian, are you free today? Do you wanna grab a coffee?"

Road Runner had told Lola of his desired name awhile ago. He and Lola were very close and could literally tell each other anything and they loved being in each others' company. However he was annoyed that he could not spend some time with her today. Spending time with Lola always put him in a good mood.

"Argh! Sorry Lola, I can't. I've…kind of got a lot going on today."

"Oh…no, that's ok, maybe some other time then," replied Lola, with slight disappointment in her voice.

Road Runner felt terrible. He knew he had let Lola down. He was about to apologise once again, but Lola had already hung up.

Road Runner sighed and felt like kicking himself. However, for now, he had to get over it, as he had important matters to attend to. So he put his phone in the glove box and drove on.

* * *

><p>The silence had finally been broken between Bugs and Daffy and for the past half an hour, they had exchanged witty banter as they usually do. However, now Daffy was trying to direct Bugs through the desert to Wile E's with just a rather rusty old map.<p>

"Ok Bugs, take the next left"

"Are you sure Daff?"

"When have I ever been wrong, Bugs?"

"Err, I am not going to answer that question doc."

Well, of course, as expected Daffy was completely wrong and in fact there was never a left turning. It only took another hour until they finally arrived at their destination.

Wile E lived in a small remote desert town, which had a lovely, friendly community. Everybody knew everybody and if someone was in trouble, all the neighbours would try to help them out.

The community liked Wile E and he was labelled as the 'handy man' of the town. Although he was the reserved sort and not the best with people, he certainly knew how to fix things. If a washing machine had broken down at the local laundrette, Wile E would happily be there to fix it. As long as he did not have to talk to many people and just get on with the job in hand, he was content.

Wile E lived in a neat little bungalow at the end of a row of houses. Although, one could say it was not the most luxurious of looking, Wile E certainly kept it spotless and had a good clean of it everyday. However, you could tell the coyote was not as bothered about his car. He owned a little rusty, brittle looking two door Ford and it did look very pathetic, even more so now that Road Runner's smart Mercedes was parked next to it.

Bugs positioned the Jeep on the pavement just outside the house. They had seen Wile E's little banger and then of course Road Runner's posh Mercedes. They also noticed a smart little Toyota on the other side of the Mercedes and Bugs and Daffy assumed this was Wile E's girlfriend's car. It looked like a typical car a girl would drive.

"Ok, Daff, Wile E's probably going to be very nervous, so play it cool."

"Bugs, I am cool!"

"Ok doc, whatever you say."

The two approached the bungalow's front door and rung the bell. It was not long before Wile E came and cautiously opened the door.

"H, h, h, hey, g, guys," the coyote stuttered.

"Hey Wile E, how are you doing?" chirped Bugs.

"Yeah…I, I'm ok."

"Oh come on! Enough of the yip yap, we wanna meet your new girl!" exclaimed Daffy, as he barged his way past Wile E and into the house.

Wile E sighed and looked firmly at Bugs. "Why on earth did you bring Daffy? I thought it was just you who was coming."

Bugs was caught off guard. He was not expecting this. "Err, sorry Wile E, but I did say on the phone that Daffy and I would be coming, don't you remember?"

Wile E sighed. "Oh Daffy is the last person I want to see right now!"

Bugs was surprised and at the same time confused. "Why? I don't understand doc."

"You'll see. Come on inside."


	3. Unexpected Announcement

Bugs was taking through to Wile E's kitchen, where he found Daffy sitting down at the small, circular dining table. Bugs sat down beside him, whilst Wile E remained standing.

"Where's Road Runner?" asked Bugs.

Wile E twitched nervously. "I am sure he'll show up soon."

"Oh who cares about Road Runner!" snapped Daffy. "We wanna see your new lover!"

Wile E sighed heavily and his nervous twitches started to become a little more violent. "He's…he's right behind ya," he squeaked.

Bugs and Daffy exchanged puzzled looks, and then turned their heads only to see Road Runner standing proud.

"What!" exclaimed Daffy.

Road Runner nodded. "That's right, I am Wile E's…_girlfriend_." He strode over to Wile E and the two of them lovingly embraced. You could see Wile E was a little awkward to the hug at first, but soon relaxed into it.

"Oh my god!" yelled Daffy, who was completely shocked and disgusted.

"Well, I'll be honest wit' ya guys. I didn't see this one coming," commented Bugs.

The duck shot up from his chair. "This is a joke isn't it!" raged Daffy. "You guys aren't really gay are you? You just think it's funny to play tricks on us!"

Road Runner lifted an eyebrow. "No Daffy, Wile E and I really are together, and we really are gay. So if you have a problem with that, then that's your problem, not ours." He put an arm around the coyote.

"Don't tell me what my problems are and aren't buddy!" scorned Daffy. "What you two have here is disgusting and I shall never approve!" With those words, the duck stormed out of the kitchen, down the hall and out of the bungalow, making sure he gave the front door a good ol' slam behind him.

Bugs shook his head, quite embarrassed by Daffy's ignorant reaction.

"That's exactly why I did not want Daffy to come!" whimpered Wile E, who was evidently hurt by the duck's scornful comments.

Bugs nodded. "Yeah…I just figured that out."

"You're cool though, aren't you Bugs?" asked Road Runner, with slight caution in his voice.

"Of course I am doc, I didn't expect it, but I am cool…and don't worry about Daff, you should never listen to what ducks say."

Road Runner relaxed and smiled. There was even a small grin on Wile E's face.

"But although unexpected," Bugs carried on. "This does answer a lot of questions. It now makes sense why Wile E was so scared on the phone."

Road Runner laughed a little. "Yeah, Wile E got himself in a right state over this…bless him." He rubbed his nose against Wile E's cheek, whilst the coyote blushed.

"And it also explains why you wanna call yourself Damian…am I right?"

Road Runner nodded. "I do feel that Damian is more me, now that I have realised I am gay."

Bugs paused and raised an eyebrow. "Wait…who does that small Toyota belong to outside?"

Road Runner and Wile E looked at each other. The coyote let out a small pathetic sigh and then slowly nodded, "Go on, tell him."

Road Runner spoke, "It's an engagement present I gave to Wile E."

Bug's jaw dropped. "You guys are getting married?"

The couple nodded.

"Well…Congratulations."

The couple smiled and kissed.

"Better not tell Daff," commented Bugs.

Road Runner laughed, but Wile E was not so amused. "Actually…on that note Bugs, we'd appreciate if you didn't tell anyone…about us…not yet…and for god's sake try and stop Daffy from telling everyone!," exclaimed Wile E.

The coyote was trying desperately to be tough, but tears kept welling up in his eyes. Road Runner kept kissing him and wiping them away, whilst Bugs could not help but turn his head during their moments of affection. Although he did not have a problem with homosexuality, it was just not really his kind of scene.

Once they had finished their intimacy, the bunny spoke again. "Hey…it's not up to me, nor is it up to Daffy, when you guys wanna share with this information with everyone else. Don't worry; I'll make sure Daffy keeps his mouth shut"

Wile E half smiled "Thank you, Bugs." His voice was still trembling. It was all too much to take in over such a short space of time.

Bugs nodded and with those words he left his chair. "Better go find Daff, and knock some sense into that idiot."

"Ha, make sure you knock him hard," exclaimed Road Runner.

Bugs smirked and then left the room.

"You see Damian, if only everyone were like Bugs, coming out would be so much easier," whimpered Wile E.

"Maybe so." Damian chuckled, "But there would be baby bunnies born every minute knowing his reputation.

Wile E gasped and gave his partner a playful slap. "Behave yourself."


	4. I wanna take you to a

An hour had gone until Bugs had finally found Daffy sitting by himself outside a little café of the small desert town. The duck was slumped in his chair with his arms folded and a grumpy expression. Bugs sighed and realised he would have to approach his friend calmly if he was going to achieve anything.

Daffy saw Bugs coming and rolled his eyes. "Have you come here to lecture me bunny boy!"

"No…I just wanna talk to ya, doc." Bugs sat down opposite him.

"Well, good, because I believe homosexuality is disgusting and my opinions will never change!" exclaimed Daffy.

Bugs lifted an eyebrow, "I'm just a little confused Daff…isn't your cousin, Daisy, a lesbian? You don't have problem with her do you?"

"Of course I don't!"

"Then what's the difference between her and Road Runner and Wile E, doc?"

"She's a lesbian for God's sake Bugs!" exclaimed Daffy. "No guy in his right mind has a problem with lesbians!"

"So it's just male homosexuality you don't like?"

"Yes…it's weird and unnatural."

Bugs shook his head. He could not believe how his friend was reacting to all of this. He sighed and, like Daffy, slumped back in his chair. He wanted to somehow change Daffy's narrow minded views, but how could he? Daffy was a stubborn asshole!

"Anyway," said Daffy. "I think it's time we go home and get away from these queers."

"Daff! We've only been here a few hours!"

"We're going home Bugs and that's final!" The duck shot off his chair and started pacing rapidly down the street. Bugs, who still remained his chair, suddenly had an idea.

"Hey Daff!"

The duck turned around. "What now!"

"Fine, have it your way, we can go home."

"Good!"

"But, how about we have a little detour through Vegas on the way back…maybe see some shows, hit a few bars."

Daffy let down his guard a little. "You serious?"

"Yeah…why not? You said you always wanted to go to Vegas."

Daffy nodded and smiled, something which he had not done for awhile. "Alright, let's do it."

* * *

><p>Lola could not wait any longer. She wanted to see him desperately. She packed her things rapidly and shot out of her LA house and into her open top sports car. She drove out of the drive and made her way into the rural desert.<p>

* * *

><p>Later that night, Bugs and Daffy made their way through Vegas as part of their little 'detour' before 'supposedly' heading home.<p>

"You know what Bugs, let's not go to any shows, I just wanna hit the bars and have a good time."

Bugs look at his friend curiously. "You sure Daff?"

The duck grew suddenly impatient. "Yes I'm sure! Now pull over and let's grab a drink."

"Keep your wig on doc. There's a good bar just up the road. We're nearly there."

Soon enough they arrived at the bar. It was called 'The Edge' and this name was shown in bright pink neon light colours placed over a double door entrance with a rather large, yet well dressed bouncer hovering outside. Two flag poles were placed either side of the entrance and from them hung stripy rainbow coloured flags.

Daffy grunted at the sight of this. "Not sure about the pink, but I like the rainbows."

Bugs smiled and together they walked in.

The bar was full of all kinds of characters of many shapes and sizes. A lot of the males were topless because of the sweltering heat of the bar, whereas most of the females were in sleeveless or bikini tops.

The bar was quite a small pathetic thing placed in the right corner of the building, however the dance floor was vast (it took up most of the room) and packed with sweaty bodies. The lighting too was impressive – showing off an endless array of colours and weird and wonderful shapes.

A topless, muscular rhino character with an interesting tribal tattoo printed across his broad chest approached the toons. Daffy was a little scared and coward behind Bugs, at which the bunny rolled his eyes. The rhino wore tight, leather pants with heavy looking biker boots. His thighs were of extraordinary size and Bugs, who was studying this man, reckoned he must have to, at least, hit the gym three times a day to keep such an athletic figure.

However despite his intimidating appearance, the rhino's voice was surprisingly soft, "You alright fellas?" He then stood in quite a queer fashion with his hip popped out, his back straight and his chest up and out. He had a smug little smile and his bright, blue eyes were gleaming, as they gazed up and down on Daffy.

Daffy now came out from behind Bugs and frowned at the rhino, perhaps in disgust or maybe in jealously, however whatever it was, he found this stranger a little odd and therefore wanted to get rid of him. "We are fine, thank you! Now if you don't mind, my friend and I want to have a private drink!" With those words the duck marched off to the bar.

Now it was just Bugs and the Rhino. "Err, sorry about my friend, he's not exactly the social type."

The rhino shrugged. "It doesn't matter…what about you? Up for a dance?"

Bugs smiled. "Sorry, but…I'm taken…and I can't dance."

The rhino shrugged again. "Humph! Your loss darling," and he strode off, disappearing amongst the crowd on the dance floor.

Bugs went to join Daff at the bar, who already was devouring a pint of cider. Once finished, Daffy slammed the glass down on the bar's surface. "I'm telling ya Bugs, that rhino fella, he was like Road Runner and Wile E! A bloody poofter! Did you see the way he was looking at me! Geez you can't get away from them can you?" Daffy's voice was rather loud and Bugs became a little awkward.

"Daff, you may wanna keep your voice down. I don't think people in here wanna hear that…and plus he was only being friendly."

Daffy snorted. "A little too friendly I think."

Bugs was about to reply, but then saw the bar maid at the opposite end of the bar. There were two people attending to the bar, one of them being a big male, chubby brown bear with a friendly face – he was the one who served Daffy – but the other, a short, slender bunny girl with dark brown fur which seemed to shine like ebony.

Bugs leant an elbow on the bar and studied her for a long while and although he could not see much, because of the wild and dark lighting of the place, he certainly liked what he could see. With the bunny in his daze and Daffy now caught up in his own homophobic slurs, neither of them realised that someone was approaching them.

This someone was a lion with a clean shaven mane and an extremely feminine appearance. He was of a small, lean build and dressed in a white, tight fitting t-shirt tucked into some white short shorts. His legs were long and smooth and looked typical of a swimmer's. In addition to his simple outfit, he wore a white sailor's hat and a shiny silver earring upon his right ear.

The lion delicately placed himself between the toons and placed both his hands on the bar in a rather camp manner. "Wella, exth…cussee me!" exclaimed Daffy whose words were a little slurred from the cider. "You arrre being vvery…vvery-"

The lion turned his head to Daffy and gave a little pout, "I'm being very what, cutie?" His voice was soft too, yet had a low, seductive tone to it.

Lightweight Daffy who was drunk from downing just one pint of cider was silenced by the extreme beauty that stood before him. He gave Bugs a nudge and said, "Woo, isn't sh, she a pwetty one Bugsth?"

Bugs raised an eyebrow, "SHE? Doc I hate to tell ya, but that ain't a.."

The lion put a finger to Bugs' lips. "Sshh big ears," he said in a teasing tone.

Bugs realised what was going to happen, but then shrugged and said quietly to the lion. "Just look after him will ya? Be nice with him."

The lion gave a girlish giggle. "Don't worry Mr. Bunny, your friend is safe with me." The lion turned to Daffy who just looked extremely happy and was casually bobbing his head along to the music. "Come on sweetness, let's go have a dance." With those words the lion grabbed Daffy's hand and the two of them disappeared onto the dance floor. Bugs watched and could not help give a chuckle.

"You've been standing here for ages Sir? Do you want a drink or what," a down to earth voice asked. Bugs turned and saw that the voice came from the bar girl bunny he was eyeing up.

"Oh yeah sorry, may have a rum and coke please?"

The bunny girl smiled. "Sure thing." She turned her back to Bugs and started making the drink. He admired the cute figure hugging black dress she wore, it not only highlighted her features in all the right places but it also complimented the dark brown colour of her fur and her long dark wavy hair.

She turned back to Bugs with the drink in hand. "There you go Sir, that'll be two dollars, forty please." Bugs dipped in his pocket and handed her the required money. He was trying to think of something to say to her but was finding it hard, which was unusual for him. The girl bunny smiled at him and asked, "Was that duck friend of yours…your boyfriend? I'm really sorry if he was coz it looks like Lottie Lion stole him."

"Haha! No, no," laughed Bugs. "I don't have a boyfriend…well…I'm not gay."

The girl bunny lifted an eyebrow. "And yet you came to a gay bar with another man?"

"Yeah…well, gay bars aren't just for gay people are they?"

"No…this is true, but it just seems an awfully odd thing for a straight man to do on a Friday night in Vegas, when there are perfectly good gentlemen's clubs around…not to mention the brothels."

Bugs nearly spat out his drink. "I am not some randy man who goes out all the time trying to take a different honey pot home every night…You didn't mention that I may want to go see some shows or try my luck at the casinos."

The girl bunny laughed. "Chill out man, I'm just playing. I shouldn't really tease you because I work at a gay bar and yet I'm no lesbian."

Bugs suddenly felt a rush of excitement over his body. "Wow, you're not gay?"

"Haha! Did that surprise you? I didn't realise I gave off lesbian vibes."

"No, I, no…I…" Bugs did not know really what to say. Why was he being such an idiot in front of this girl? He had never had trouble chatting up girls before.

"The name is Coco by the way," she said casually as she held out her hand.

Bugs shook it. "Bugs…nice to meet you Coco."

The two bunnies stood together in silence for awhile and both smiled at each other.

* * *

><p>Bugs and Daffy did not go back to LA that night. In fact something rather different happened….<p>

Bugs was in bed. He was in his hotel room, 202. The hotel was only a small one with three floors but it was conveniently just down the road from Wile E's. He let his body sink into the mattress before letting out a sigh and turning over to look at his clock on the bedside surface…12:15.

"Geez, what time did I get back last night?" he said to himself. He rubbed his head. He perhaps had a bit too much to drink – he had to get a taxi home and leave his car parked outside 'The Edge.' At some point, he would need to get it, but not right now.

He then lay still for awhile enjoying the silence, but this was soon interrupted by the clatter of footsteps along the hotel corridor. The footsteps sounded familiar to Bugs and as they got louder and closer, he knew exactly who they belonged to…

Daffy came charging through the door. "BUGS! He yelled at the top of his voice. "Why on earth did you take me to a gay bar last night?"

Bugs sat up in bed, the duvet still covering his bottom half. "Whoa Daff, calm down…"

"CALM DOWN? Don't tell me to calm down bunny boy! The most horrific thing happened to me last night! That Lottie Lion character did not turn out to be a 'Lottie' at all. SHE HAD A PENIS BUGS! Lottie Lion was a man! And because she kept buying me drinks, I got real drunk and guess what…" Daffy halted in his rage and started gasping heavily.

"What? Daff, what happened?" asked Bugs hastily.

Daffy gulped. "I lost my anal virginity," he murmured under his breath.

Bugs pricked up his ear. "Sorry doc, I didn't quite catch that."

"I lost my anal virginity!" snapped Daffy much more loudly.

Bugs pulled a face. "Ouch. I bet it hurt."

"Yes! As a matter of fact, it did! If you tell anyone bunny boy about this, I swear I will…I will not be pleasant to you."

Bugs shrugged. "My mouth is shut."

Daffy let out a small sigh of relief.

"As long..," continued Bugs. "As long as you don't tell anybody about Wile E and Road Runner."

Daffy shot a look at Bugs. The bunny just casually smiled in return. The duck jabbed a finger at Bugs. "You planned this didn't you?"

"Well, not exactly doc, I didn't mean for…" However before Bugs could finish, Daffy dived upon him and started to wrestle with him.

Suddenly there was a groan from the other side of the bed. Bugs and Daffy paused their fighting and looked over. There was a lump. Someone else was in Bugs' bed.

"What's all the racket?" groaned a sleepy Coco as she emerged from the covers.

Daffy gave a horrified look at Bugs and all of a sudden it came back to Bugs what had happened last night…he and Coco got very merry, it started off with harmless flirtation at the bar, which lead to making out on the dance floor, which then lead to getting a taxi home together hand in hand, which finally lead to them sleeping together.

A shocked Daffy slowly removed himself from the bed. "I think we both did very regrettable things last night."


	5. Deeper Trouble

Lola finally arrived at Wile E's. It was early in the afternoon on a Saturday morning. The traffic had been quite a nightmare through LA, but once she reached the desert roads, everything seemed to quieten down a bit.

She knocked on the front door twice. She looked at the cars outside and thought it was odd she couldn't see Bugs' Jeep. Road Runner answered the door and Lola pulled a great big smile. "I knew you would be here." She hastily wrapped her arms around his neck and gently sunk her head into his shoulder.

Road Runner was a little surprised to see the girl bunny, but was happy for sure. "It's always lovely to see you, Lola…I'm glad you came."

Lola released her grip on him and turned her head back at the cars. "Have Bugs and Daff even arrived? I can't see Bugs' Jeep."

Road Runner sighed. "Yeah, they arrived…but Daffy did not exactly take the news very well, therefore we thought it best if they stay at the small hotel down the road…I didn't want Wile E getting all wound up by Daffy."

Lola nodded. "I assume Bugs is okay with it all?"

Road Runner smiled. "Of course Bugs is okay with it."

Lola sighed with relief. "Well…that's something at least."

* * *

><p>"Call me, alright?" said Coco and kissed Bugs on the cheek.<p>

Bugs looked awkward and scratched the back of his head, "Yeah, yeah…I will."

Coco smiled. "I look forward to seeing you again." She then strode down the hotel hallway and before reaching the stairs; she turned around for the last time and blew Bugs a kiss, then continued her way to the exit.

Bugs did not respond. He just stood in the door way of his hotel room staring into space.

Daffy, who was sitting down on a chair in the corner of the room, was equally as shocked. "Did you even tell her you had a girlfriend?"

"No," murmured Bugs.

Daffy put a hand to his face. "Oh geez Bugs! I was a fool to think you actually loved Lola."

Bugs sharply turned around. "I do love Lola!" he snapped with an almighty temper.

Daffy jumped in his chair. It was unusual for Bugs to be angry. "Well…you sure have an odd way of showing it," the duck replied.

Bugs sniggered. "Yeah, and you have an odd way of showing your straight!"

Daffy shot off the chair and raised a clenched fist. "You're pushing it bunny boy!"

Bugs raised his palms and suddenly changed his mood. "Ok, ok…sorry Daff, I shouldn't have said that…let's just try and be calm."

Daffy returned to the chair, yet clearly still pissed off. "I am not gay!" he exclaimed.

Before anything else could be said, there was a knock at the door. "Bugs? You in?" It was Lola.

Bugs and Daffy exchanged glances. "What the hell is she doing here?" said Bugs in a panicked and frantic whisper.

Daffy shrugged. "I dunno, maybe she knows something's up…you're in trouble Bugs."

Bugs shook his head. "No, no, no…no I'm not in trouble…how can she know what happened last night?"

There was another knock at the door. "Bugs?" called Lola again. "I can hear voices...come on let me in."

Bugs sighed. "Ok…here goes," he whispered as he approached the door.

"Do you want me to hide?" asked Daffy.

Bugs lifted an eyebrow. "I guess…if you want."

The duck nodded and dived under the bed and then without further hesitation, Bugs opened the door and as expected, there stood Lola, looking beautiful – as always. She smiled at him and gave him a kiss on the cheek. Bugs flinched, as it was only moments ago that Coco did the same.

"Lola?" he gulped. "What a surprise!"

She again pulled her cute little grin. "Yeah…well, I'd thought I'd come and see you." She then looked around the room with a slight puzzled look on her face. "I could have sworn I heard another voice in here."

"No, no, it's just me…I was just rehearsing some lines."

Lola nodded. "Oh…fair enough." There was a short silence, as Lola studied her boyfriend. "You okay Bugs? You seem a little…off."

"Me? No, no I'm fine! There's nothing wrong with me." Bugs was trying to play it cool.

Lola shrugged. "Probably just the heat of the desert that's making you act up...I know the heat can get to me sometimes."

Bugs nodded with fake confidence. "Yes! That's definitely it! That's what is making me feel so cranky…it's the heat! This place is soooo hot!"

Daffy, who remained hidden under the bed, brought a palm to his face. "Oh brother! God help you Bugs!" he muttered carefully under his breath, so neither of the bunnies could hear him.

Lola pulled a cheeky little smile. "Are you trying to fool me Bugs?"

Bugs' heart jumped in a panic. "What? What? Trying to fool you with what?"

Lola giggled and started to slowly approach her boyfriend. "Are trying to fool me with this 'crazy, stressed out' behaviour of yours just so you can get a back-rub?"

For a moment, Bugs looked baffled, but then he soon replaced it with a smile. "Ha! You caught me! That's…exactly what I am doing. You know how much I love your back rubs." He laughed awkwardly. "It's a crying shame I have a girlfriend who can read me like a book.

Lola laughed and then slowly put her arms around his neck and lifted herself slightly so they were nose to nose. Bugs put his hands around her hips and already started to feel wonderful sensations between his thighs.

Lola kissed him on the lips. They let their tongues explore each other's mouths for awhile, until Lola broke the contact and said, "Get on the bed, stud!"

* * *

><p>"So why exactly is Lola here?" asked Wile E with a slightly harsh tone.<p>

Road Runner lifted an eyebrow. "She just thought she'd come and visit…and plus she's a good friend. It's always nice to have her here."

"Hmph! Nice indeed."

"Oh, not this again Wile E!"

"You want me to like her, I know, but I can't, Damian!"

"That's because you're acting like a jealous five year old, Wile E! After all the support she's given us…and yet you refuse to show her the least bit of respect!"

"Well can you blame me!" exclaimed the coyote at the top of his voice. "I seem to recall seeing you and her in bed together the last time she visited! And there was you saying 'we're just friends, nothing more,' and guess what? You shagged her. You lied right to my face!"

"For heaven's sake Wile E! How many times have I told you? It was a huge mistake! We were both completely drunk and none of us knew really what we were doing! Why can't you just accept that?"

Wile E clenched his fists and began to breathe heavily. He was infuriated. "If she doesn't leave here right away, I'm telling Bugs everything…I'm telling him about this 'little affair' between you and Lola."

* * *

><p>"Okay, I'm going to have a trip to the shop…do you want me to get you anything sweetie?" asked Lola.<p>

Bugs remained in the bed love struck and with a huge satisfied grin on his face. "No, no, I'm good."

"Okay…do you reckon I could take your Jeep?"

Bugs' eyes widened thinking of where the Jeep was and getting flashbacks of the night before. "Err…it's…I've sent it to the local garage…something was wrong with the…the exhaust."

Lola lifted an eyebrow. "Oh...that's funny, I didn't know the Jeep was having problems."

"Well…you know how cars can be…unpredictable!"

"Hmm." She shrugged, "I guess so…anyway I'll be off. See you later and if I'm not too tired we can do it again later," she said in a flirtatious tone, whilst winking.

Bugs blew a kiss back and Lola left the room. He sighed with huge relief. "Safe!" he muttered to himself.

"SAFE!" a booming voice came from below the bed. Bugs nearly jumped out of his skin. He had forgotten all about Daffy hiding under the bed.

The duck clumsily came out and scrambled to his feet. "You're not safe at all! That was yet another lie you told to her!"

"Look Daff, I know I'm in deep trouble right now…but I could really do with your support."

"Pfft! You want _my_ support? Not only was it your fault that you made me go home with _Lottie _but then you put me through listening to your yucky bunny sex with Lola!"

A small smile crept to Bugs' face. "Hey, doc, it was your idea to hide under the bed, that ain't my fault."

The duck put a palm to his face. "Oh Bugs, you are one hell of a bunny!"

Bugs smiled yet again. "Thanks."

"That wasn't a compliment!" snapped Daffy.


	6. Heating Up

Daffy was sitting in the café of the small desert town. He was in a bad mood, as per usual and right now he just wanted to be alone to think quietly to himself. He took a few slow swigs of his cappuccino and brushed his head fur back. The waiter, a tubby alligator dressed in a dirty, coffee coloured apron, realised the toon was sad.

"You alright there mate?" the gator asked.

Daffy did not want to be talked to, but nevertheless tried to be polite. "I'm fine…thanks."

The gator grunted and then left Daffy alone to tend to other customers in the café. The small bell above the entrance rang; someone had entered, but Daffy's back was to the door and he could not be bothered to turn around to see who it was.

"Wile E!" bellowed the gator in a chirpy manner spreading his large arms wide welcoming the coyote for a hug.

Daffy's eye's widened and he sharply turned around to see the gator giving Wile E Coyote a big bear hug. The duck could not help feel a little bit stupid after all the homophobic things he had said to the coyote and especially now after what had happened to him. He dipped his head and hunched his shoulders, keeping a low profile in hope the coyote would not see him.

"Hello Daffy," Wile E said bluntly, as he stood right behind his fellow toon. Daffy's low profile plan had not quite worked.

"Hello Wile E," he replied. "Fancy seeing you here."

There was an awkward pause. Wile E hovered behind Daffy for a moment as if waiting for him to say something. However, upon realising the duck was remaining quite silent, he gave up and moved to sit upon one of the stools at the counter to talk to the big, friendly alligator.

Daffy sighed in relief and decided to finish his drink quickly and get out of the place as fast as he could. The entrance bell rang again and Wile E waved, so therefore Daffy assumed it was Road Runner who had entered, but in fact he could not be more wrong. It was Lottie. Daffy's coffee nearly burst out of his mouth. What the hell was Lottie doing here? How on earth did he know Wile E?

Wile E and Lottie Lion greeted each other with pecks on the cheek. The lion looked incredibly dapper; wearing a white shirt with a neat little black bow tie, which Wile E reached up and adjusted. They sat opposite each other of the counter and Lottie was the first to speak, "So how are you anyway my darling? You sounded quite upset on the phone? Is it Damian? Is he treating you bad?"

Wile E rested his cheek on his knuckle. "Yeah…it's partly that," he replied.

Daffy, who was eavesdropping, took a moment to remind himself that Damian was in fact Road Runner's new name and although part of him wanted to stay, as he could not resist gossip, he knew it would be best to leave. He cautiously got up from his chair and tried to slyly make his way to the door but instead walked right into a table which made the whole café stop in their tracks and stare.

"Bollocks," muttered Daffy under his breath.

"Daffy, my darling! How nice to see you again," chirped Lottie in his ever so camp voice.

"You know Daff?" asked Wile E a little confused.

Daffy cringed. He knew what was coming next.

"Oh yes, I met him at The Edge the other night…twas a good night wasn't it Daff?"

Daffy gulped and cringed as he saw Wile E's jaw drop in shock and how everything was calculating up in his mind. "Oh you have got to be kidding me!" the coyote exclaimed.

With those words, Daffy ran out of the café. Lottie was calling after him but he ignored it. He did not know where he was running to, he just figured that he needed to get out of this town and far away from all this toon drama, and plus now that after Wile E would find out about everything from Lottie, Daffy could never face him again. He was too embarrassed by it all.

* * *

><p>"Where is Daffy at? I haven't seen him since I came here, he's alright isn't he?" asked a concerned Lola.<p>

"Oh don't worry about Daff, he's big and ugly enough to take care of himself," replied Bugs. The bunnies were in the hotel room and lying together on the bed. They had just quite literally been 'at it like rabbits.'

"Lola?"

"Yes?"

"Is it our relationship just about sex?"

Lola lifted an eyebrow. "What makes you ask that?"

Bugs shrugged. "Well, I know we know a lot about each other already, but we don't talk like we used to…we seem to have sex most of the time."

"Well…that's not necessarily a bad thing and plus we are rabbits after all," chuckled Lola.

"Yeah I know but…I fear lately we've been losing connection between each other."

Lola folded her arms and stared at her man. "Where has all of this come from? Our relationship is fine, if we get anyway near the state of Wile E's and Road Runner's relationship that's when we'll start to panic!"

Bugs raised an eyebrow. "They're having problems? They seemed fine when I saw them."

"Oh believe me, they are having problems! Why on earth are they getting married? I don't know!"

A sudden puzzlement hit Bugs. "Wait…how doid you know about Wile E and Road Runner? Did I tell you about them during sex? Because I know I can spout random things when making love."

Lola became slightly awkward and cleared her throat. "No…I've known about those two for quite awhile."

Bugs looked even more confused. "Since when?" he exclaimed, "And who told you?"

"Road Runner…or Damian told me," replied Lola. "It was about six months ago."

"Six months!" yelled Bugs. "All that time you knew and you never told me! And plus why are you so special that Road Runner, or should I say _Damian, _tells you before me?"

"Oh stop acting like a jealous five year old!" Lola was infuriated. "You know how much Damian and I are good friends! It would be incredibly bad of me to have told you before Damian did."

"Maybe so, but I am your boyfriend Lola! Surely that counts for something?"

Lola was about to spout an angry reply, but instead she took a deep breath and hastily got off the bed. "Do you know what? I'm gonna take a walk, which will give you the chance to calm down and perhaps grow up a little."

Bugs reached over to try and stop her, but she was out of the door in an instant. Bugs scrambled off the bed and charged out of the room in hope to catch her on the corridor, but she was a first mover and she was gone.

"Oh for Pete's sake!" he cursed

* * *

><p>Lola was pacing fast down the road. She was going to Road Runner's. She wanted to talk to him to get things off her chest. Little did she know that Wile E was close behind her walking home, as he had finished his catch up with his good friend Lottie at the café.<p>

"Where do you think you're going?" called Wile E.

Lola turned around sharply thinking it was Bugs, but once realising it was Wile E, she softened a little. "Oh Wile E…hello."

"Come here to steal my man have you?" snapped Wile E.

Lola frowned. "Are you still hung up about that one time between Damian and I?"

"But it wasn't just the one time was it Lola?"

"Oh would stop being a jealous child! I've just dealt with one back at the hotel, so don't you start!" she spat.

"I suggest you turn around and go back where you came from, otherwise I'm telling Bugs everything!"

A surge of panic hit Lola "Leave Bugs out of this will you?"

Wile E laughed. "Ha! I don't think so my dear…now I suggest you turn around and go back home."

* * *

><p>Back at the hotel, Bugs was hitting himself. "You stupid idiot Bugs! Why did you flip out at Lola."<p>

The bunny was now at the bar. He felt it was quite an appropriate place to be after what had just happened. He picked up his whiskey and was about to have a sweet first taste of it but was interrupted by a female voice.

"Bugs?"

He turned around thinking it was Lola, but nearly dropped his drink, when he saw Coco instead. He had started to forget about her, as that was usually the way with his one night stands. "Coco? What a…pleasant surprise."

Coco sighed in annoyance. "Why haven't you called me Bugs?"

Bugs became awkward and scratched the back of his head. "Yeah...about that…errr…a lot of things have been happening in my life…I just haven't got round to it."

Coco just shook her head. "Bull."

"There you are Bugs!" another female voice said. This time it was Lola.

"Oh God," muttered Bugs to himself.

"Look Bugs, how about we go back to the room and talk?" suggested Lola. There was a hint of panic in her voice. She placed a shaky hand on Bugs' arm.

Coco frowned at all of this. "And who exactly is she?" she asked looking at the male bunny.

Lola had not really taken much notice of Coco, but now she looked at her and lifted an eyebrow. "Who am I? I'm Bugs' girlfriend…who on earth are you?" Bugs' whole body tensed. He knew this going to end messily.

"GIRLFRIEND?" exclaimed Coco. "Bugs, you never told me you had a girlfriend!"

"What?" blurted Lola, as she darted an unpleasant glare at her man.

"Oh crap," murmered Bugs, as he brought a hand to his face.


	7. Coyote Ugly

"Why on earth did you not tell me you had a girlfriend you idiot! We spent the whole night together!" yelled Coco at the top of her voice.

Bugs was trying to calm things down, as people started to stop and stare in the bar. He was getting quite embarrassed, but then again it could be argued that he had it coming to him.

"I can't believe I'm hearing this!" exclaimed Lola. "Why did you not tell me about this woman? Did you even think to mention you already had a girl when you were on top of her?"

Bugs choked on his whiskey at that comment. He responded in between coughs and splutters. "Can we all…just…calm down. Please…give me the chance…to explain."

Both of the girls looked at each other and folded their arms. "You sure as hell better explain!" snapped Coco, returning her attention back on Bugs.

"And it better be good!" added Lola.

The truth was, Bugs did not have an excuse for what he did. Although he was trying desperately to weave some excuse together on the spot, the girls were not buying it. Coco slowly approached him on the stool, tilted his head and_ WHAM…_gave him a huge slap across the face.

"You deserved that you arrogant asshole!" spat Coco. "Pray to God that you never see me again or I might just kill you!" With those words she stormed out of the bar making sure the door made a huge slam behind her.

Bugs' cheek was throbbing. "Geez she's got a hand like a whale's fin!"

Lola still remained just staring at her boyfriend with her arms folded. Bugs looked up at her, "I'm sorry! Geez Lola, what else do you want me to say?"

There was a short silence between them as they looked into each other's eyes. "Bugs?" responded Lola eventually.

"Yes?"

"Go fuck yourself." After those words, she paced out of the bar area.

"Hmph," grunted the barman. "Hell hath no fury like a woman's scorn." He then chuckled to himself. Bugs shot him a disapproving look, which triggered the barman to stop his laughter immediately.

* * *

><p>Absolute silence lay between Wile E and Road Runner. Quite coincidently, they too had just had a huge argument. Wile E was jealous of Road Runner and Lola spending so much time together and of course Road Runner was denying it all. They were a couple that tried to make everything look all happy and dandy on the outside, but truly they were falling apart. They were both actors and most of the time they were convincing at the 'happy' couple stuff. It was Wile E's initial idea to get married, it was his desperate attempt to try and bring him and Road Runner closer together, but in fact ever since the engagement, things had just been getting worse. Wile E became more jealous and Road Runner more controlling.<p>

Since their argument, they had avoided each other around the house. Wile E was in the lounge sprawled out on the sofa with his drawing pad, trying to sketch anything he could to get his mind off things. Road Runner, however, was pacing around in the kitchen thinking things through. Wile E listened to his partner's footsteps padding on the kitchen's marble floor. For some reason, it made him sleepy and his eyes began to slowly close and his thoughts became random.

He had been drawing a desert landscape and now suddenly that landscape had come to life. He saw himself and Road Runner standing a few metres apart by a cactus, they were just looking at each other blankly without saying a word. A few seconds past and some tumble weed blew in between them. From then on, his mind went all over the place and his thoughts had truly become very random, for now Wile E was properly asleep.

"Wile E," called Road Runner from the kitchen. "Wile E?" The bird entered the sitting room to see his partner fast asleep on the sofa. There was a loud knock at the door, but Wile E did not stir in the slightest, so Road Runner left him be and went to answer the door.

* * *

><p>Wile E woke up slowly and rubbed his eyes. He lazily got himself up and looked around, Road Runner was no longer in the kitchen and all was quiet. The coyote looked up at the clock realising he had been gone for a couple of hours. He let out a big yawn; he hated having naps in the day as it made him feel so sluggish.<p>

His ears twitched, he thought he heard something – he thought he heard voices. He looked around once more, but saw nothing and yet again everything was still and silent. He shook his head and decided it was his tired mind playing tricks on him. He slowly got up to standing and plodded into the kitchen to make a coffee. His ears twitched, there was the noise again. This time it was louder, it was definitely voices coming from upstairs; Wile E knew he was not imagining things this time.

He lifted an eyebrow and scratched his head, he had not properly woken up yet, he was confused over what was going on. He dragged himself out of the kitchen, down the hallway and slumbered up the stairs, the voices were getting louder and clearer. Once he reached the landing, he heard the blasting water of the shower and realised the voices were coming from the washroom. The door was slightly ajar and Wile E naughtily had a peak in.

He gasped, he could not believe what he was seeing. It was like a whole tonne of bricks came crashing down on him or a massive knife cutting through his heart. In the shower was Road Runner and Lola hugging, kissing and caressing each other. He wanted to scream, he wanted to cry. Although he had been betrayed before by the pair of them, this time it seemed worse, much worse.

There was a knock at the door, but the couple in the shower did not hear it, they were too busy with each other. Wile E's jaw grinded and his fists clenched, they were not going to get away with this, not anymore. He ran down stairs and flung the door open and a small evil grin appeared on his face when he saw Bugs standing at his doorstep. "Ahhh Bugs! How lovely to see you!" he chirped.

"Hey Wile E, do you know where Lola is at? I really need to talk to her," the bunny asked.

Wile E chuckled. "Oh I know where she is!" With those words the coyote grabbed Bugs by the arm and yanked him inside.

"Wile E! What are you doing?"

"Shhh!" said Wile E putting a finger to Bugs' lips. "Just be quiet and follow me."

Bugs raised an eyebrow, but did as he was told. He followed Wile E up the stairs and onto the landing. He became even more confused when the coyote stopped in front of the washroom door. "Wile E, what is going on?" he asked.

The coyote nodded his head at the door. "Go in."

"I'm not going in there when someone's having a shower!" protested Bugs.

Wile E rolled his eyes. "Oh for God's sake!" He pushed Bugs into the washroom.

Road Runner and Lola were startled. Lola let out a little scream in fright. When the couple saw Bugs, horror hit their faces and they froze with the shower water still pouring onto them.

Bugs was equally in horror at what he saw. "What the…?"

Wile E casually strode into the room. "And just to let you know Bugs, this isn't the first time they've been at it, it's the….fourth, no fifth time? To be honest, I've lost count."

Road Runner darted a cold look at Wile E, but the coyote just smiled back. "Bugs.," said the bird calmly. "Don't listen to Wile E…it's not what it looks like."

"Not what it looks like!" exclaimed Bugs. "Then, what the hell is it, doc? I thought we were friends Road Runner, I thought I could trust you!"

Lola rolled her eyes. "Oh give off Bugs, you've done ten times worse!"

Bugs jabbed a finger at Lola. "You! You Missy can shut up!"

Road Runner put his hands in the air. "Please, can we all just remain calm!"

The shouting match continued for quite awhile in the washroom, despite Road Runner's efforts to keep the peace. No-one had noticed that Wile E had left the room. The coyote had made his way to the basement where all his TNT and various other explosives were. They were not the crappy explosives he used when filming at WB studios, that stuff could not even kill a mouse. This was the real stuff, the highly dangerous stuff.

The coyote cackled. "Oh, why can't people understand, you should never upset a coyote."


	8. Boom

"Ok Bugs, it is true that Lola and I have been having an affair over the past few months. But when she found out about Wile E and I, she was so supportive and understanding," confessed Road Runner.

Bugs was infuriated. "Oh and for that reason, you just go ahead and shag her...you're supposed to be gay aren't you?"

"Bugs!" snapped Lola.

"People can be attracted to both genders you know!" declared the bird.

"Oh right yeah sorry, you're bisexual. Pah! Coz, of course, that's a genuine sexuality," responded Bugs in a very sarcastic manner. The bird and female bunny gasped in shock at that comment.

"You see the thing is," continued Bugs, "I don't believe you have a sexuality doc, I think you just shag anything that moves. What you have with both Lola and Wile E means nothing…you wouldn't know love if it was standing right in front of you."

"Oh, and I suppose you know exactly what love is don't you Bugs?" spat Lola sarcastically.

Bugs was about to respond, but was interrupted by Wile E skipping into the room. "Hello, how are we all doing?" he bellowed. The three toons looked at the coyote as if he had gone mad. "Bugs, I want you to come with me."

Bugs stared at the coyote. "And leave these two alone? Ha, I don't think so, doc!"

"Oh come on, Bugs," replied Wile E. "They've done enough damage already, haven't they?"

Road Runner sighed. "Wile E! What are you up to?" he asked firmly.

"Nothing my dear, I just want a chat with my good friend, Bugs."

"Actually you know what Wile E," chimed Bugs. "I think I will leave these two alone, they can do whatever the hell they want. I don't care anymore."

"Fabulous!" chirped the coyote.

Bugs strode out of the room, as if nothing had bothered him (it was all an act of course). Wile E smiled at the couple and winked at Road Runner, he then left the room to join Bugs. The bird lifted an eyebrow, he knew Wile E was up to something, but he didn't know what.

"Let's get of here Wile E!" demanded Bugs.

"Oh, don't worry we are," casually responded Wile E.

The two toons left the house together and walked quickly down the road. Wile E kept looking at his watch.

* * *

><p>Back at the house, Road Runner and Lola were drying themselves off from the shower. They had not spoken a word since Bugs and Wile E left. Lola stood in front of the mirror for awhile just staring at herself. Road Runner looked over at her and sighed, "We screwed up…big time."<p>

"Hmph! Bugs deserved it, he cheated on me only very recently!" replied Lola.

"Yes but, I'm assuming that was only the once…us animals have been at it for awhile…and we've been constantly lying to everyone around us!"

Lola looked a little ashamed at herself after those words; she awkwardly rubbed her hands together. Deep down, she knew the bird was right.

"If only..," continued Road Runner. "If only, you hadn't seduced me that drunken night in Las Vegas."

Lola frowned and sharply turned her head. "Seduced you? So you're blaming everything on me now, are you?"

"Oh gosh! I didn't mean it like that…I'm sorry Lola, I shouldn't have said that."

Lola was about to reply, but paused. She sniffed the air, "Do you smell that?"

The bird looked confused. "Smell what?"

"It smells like burning."

* * *

><p>Wile E and Bugs were still walking around town, going anywhere they could and getting as far away as possible from the house. The coyote looked at his watch, "One minute," he said.<p>

Bugs looked puzzled, "What?"

Wile E smiled. "Don't worry."

* * *

><p>Road Runner sniffed the air. "Yes, I can smell it."<p>

"Well…where is it coming from?" asked Lola.

The bird marched out of the washroom and onto the landing. He was trying to follow the aroma, it was getting stronger already. Lola joined him and noticed fumes outside the landing's window. "Look!" she blurted out, whilst pointing at the fumes.

The pair of them rushed over to the window and looked out into the back garden.

* * *

><p>Wile E once again looked at his watch. "20 seconds."<p>

"What are you on about, doc?"

* * *

><p>"Oh my god!" yelled Road Runner as he noticed the barrel of TNT neatly placed by the house. Its fuse was lit and decreasing fast, it was now extremely short.<p>

Lola had noticed it too. "We've gotta get out of her!" she screamed.

* * *

><p>"10, 9, 8…" counted Wile E quite calmly.<p>

"Doc! What is all of this? You're starting to piss me off!" exclaimed Bugs.

* * *

><p>Road Runner grabbed Lola's hand and together they raced down the stairs and out of the front door. The bird could have easily pegged it down the road to gain a safe distance, but he just couldn't leave Lola behind. Instead, he kept to Lola's pace which although was fast, it wasn't fast enough.<p>

* * *

><p>"3, 2, 1, BOOM!"<p>

* * *

><p>The house exploded. Lola and Road Runner went flying. A volcano of flames shot up into the air piercing the clear blue sky and sent an array of shattered pieces of the house all over the place. The toons landed violently on the hard, gravel floor covered in blood. The neighbours started emerging from their houses screaming and shouting.<p>

"Someone call the police!"

"Someone call an ambulance!"

* * *

><p>The explosion was heard faintly in the town. "What was that?" questioned Bugs. "You knew that was going to happen…you timed it perfectly." People in the town had stopped in their tracks and started to talk. There was a sea of concerned and worried faces.<p>

Wile E shrugged. "I only blew up the house."

Bugs glared at him. "You what?"

"I blew up the house, Damian and Lola deserved it didn't they?"

Bugs was at the brink of screaming. "You mean to say that you blew up the house with Lola and Road Runner still in it?"

Wile E nodded. "They should be dead now."

Bugs cautiously backed away from the coyote. "You're a psycho!"

"But a lovely one," smiled the coyote.

After those words, Bugs ran. He needed to get back to the house to see if there was any chance that his fellow toons could still be alive.

Wile E watched him leave, shrugged and began to walk in the opposite direction.


	9. Putting the desert behind

As Bugs got closer to the house, he heard sirens, shouting and saw lots of panicked looking people on the street. Despite all the drama that had been going on between the toons, he wanted them to be alive, although he knew the chances were slim.

He darted around the last corner and paused for a moment, as he saw the blown up house, the ambulance, the police cars and the gatherings of people at the end of the road. The area was blocked off by police tape, yet still Bugs ran to the scene pushing past people in hope to catch a glimpse of Lola or Road Runner. There were too many people blocking his vision and before he could get any closer, two policemen came and attempted to escort the crowds away.

"Alright, come on people, move along please!" one bellowed.

* * *

><p>Daffy had lost track of time and the days. He had run away from that small desert town and was on the road for quite awhile. His feet burned from all the walking and the intense heat nearly killed him, but luckily he had stumbled across a small motel just in the nick of time. So whilst all this drama was happening with his fellow toons, which he was completely oblivious to, Daffy had been moping around in a tiny motel room drinking his sorrows away.<p>

He didn't know if he was gay or not, his indefinable sexuality was gnawing away at him. The truth was, he quite enjoyed that night with Lottie, believe it or not, he was just too embarrassed to admit it. He thought that everybody would make a laughing stock out of him if it went public.

There was a knock at his door and Daffy was not in a sociable mood. "Go away! Clean the room another day please!" There was another knock. "Geez! Are you def? I said go away!" Despite Daffy's complaints the door opened. The duck was about to yell again, but stopped in his tracks, when he saw Wile E standing in his door way.

"Wile E? What are you doing here? How did you know I…,"

Wile E cut in. "I saw you heading south, when you left the café. This is the first motel you pass when heading south from my town…common sense told me you would be here."

There was then an awkward silence between them. Eventually, Daffy sighed, "Wile E, I wanted to apologise for what I said…"

"No, no, no," cut in Wile E once again. "It's fine…no need to apologise, I know deep down you didn't mean it."

Daffy pulled an awkward half smile. "I suppose Lottie told you everything."

Wile E smiled and nodded. "Oh yeah."

"Please don't judge me," muttered Daffy.

"Judge you?" exclaimed the coyote. "I'm a flippin' poofter myself, why would I judge you!" Daffy could not help but laugh at that comment and Wile E joined in.

"Why have you come here anyway, Wile E?"

"You're my only hope…you see…things have gone slightly bad back at home and I just wanted somebody to talk to…that's all."

Daffy lifted an eyebrow. "What do you mean 'things have gone bad?'"

"Oh…don't worry. It will blow over."

"Well…you said you wanted to talk, so I'm here to talk."

The coyote did not say anything, instead approached his fellow toon slowly, taking hold of his hands gently and giving him a soft kiss on the lips. The duck tensed up, it did not feel right that this was happening. He broke the kiss and freed his hands from Wile E's grip, "Whoa, whoa Wile E, this isn't right, you're with Road Runner, uh, I mean Damian!"

Wile E rolled his eyes. "I couldn't give a shit about Damian!"

A puzzled Daffy was about to reply, but was interrupted by the knocking down of his room door by a group of police officers. Daffy was startled and threw his hands in the air, "Eeep! You're arresting us because we're two guys and we just kissed, aren't you?"

The head policeman, a butch looking grey bulldog, frowned. "Errr, no! We just want the coyote." Wile E did not react to this. He was not even startled by the police bombarding the room. It was like he was expecting this the whole time. The police team all pointed their guns at Wile E and the head policeman spoke once again, "Wile Ethelbert Coyote, you're under arrest for the attempted murder of Road Runner and Lola Bunny!"

Daffy's eyes widened. "What?"

Two police officers grabbed Wile E and handcuffed his hands behind his back. "Take him away," grunted the bulldog. He then looked towards Daffy, "Sorry for the disturbance sir."

* * *

><p><em>Now for today's top story…this is the chaos that has broken out with several members of Warner Brothers Studios' Looney Toons. Popular toon and famous for his stunts with explosives, Wile Ethelbert Coyote has been charged with the attempted murder of fellow colleagues, Road Runner and Lola Bunny. It is believed that following an argument he had with the two in his home, he placed TNT by the side of the house, then walked into his local town so he was a safe distance away from the explosion. Fortunately Road Runner and Lola did not die, but have suffered severe burns and several broken bones. This event has quite likely ruined the acting careers of all three of the toons.<em>

* * *

><p>A few months later, Wile E was found guilty and was put into jail. Road Runner and Lola bunny were never going to return to Warner Bros. as they were now in wheel chairs for life. Road Runner got a job in Las Vegas, co-owning a night club, whereas Lola returned back to LA with Bugs. A lot of water had passed under the bridge between the two bunnies. After all the mayhem that had gone on between them, this was quite weirdly exactly what they needed to make them realise they loved each other. After work, Bugs would hastily make his way home to check on Lola and most of the time, because she was a strong woman, she was absolutely fine. Every now and then, she just needed help getting changed or going to the toilet, which Bugs would happily do.<p>

Daffy had come out as bi-sexual to the whole studio and realised that he was not the only one, as several other toons would drag him aside to talk to him about their questionable sexualities. It boosted his self-confidence big time, because Daffy loved to feel important by offering help and support to his friends. He realised that he had been worrying over nothing, as the entire studio supported him when he came out.

It was a cold autumn morning and Bugs and Daffy had just arrived at the studio and were making their way in. "So, are the rumours true? That today we are having a new director on set?" asked Daffy.

Bugs shrugged. "Dunno, doc, we'll have to wait and see."

Together, they walked through the automatic double doors and strode down the wide and occupied corridor of the studio. "Oh, I forgot to ask you Bugs," said Daffy.

"What?"

"I mean I know you're driving a suave new Bentley now, but whatever happened to your Jeep?"

Bugs awkwardly laughed. "Do you remember Coco?"

Daffy nodded. "Yes…I remember her."

"Well…when she found out Lola was with me after our night together, she went and trashed the thing up with a hammer…then set it alight."

"Geez! If there's one thing I learnt Bugs, it's that there are some real weirdos who live in the desert!"

"Ha! You can say that again, doc, I hope to never see her again."

Keith Baxter, one of the directors in WB was standing at the end of the long corridor waiting for the duck and bunny to join him. "Hey look, it's Keith."

"Looks like he wants to talk to us."

They both quickened their pace and soon were with Keith at the corridor's end. "Good to see you boys, hope you are well," said Baxter in a jolly manner. "Now, as you two are the stars of this studio, I thought I'd give you the pleasure of meeting our recently new recruited director."

"Ah, me and Daff thought the whole new director thing was a rumour," said Bugs.

"Oh no, no!" responded Baxter. "You are both quite wrong. She's with us right now, so without further ado let me introduce you to Miss Coco Bunny."

Bugs' body tensed, whilst Daffy gasped. Keith held out his hand in front of him and focused his eyes on Coco, who was standing behind the toons. They both slowly turned around and there she was, looking as glamorous as ever, Coco Bunny from the gay bar in Las Vegas.

"Hello Bugs," she said in a devious tone with an evil looking smile on her face.

"H, h, h, well hello…Coco," stuttered Bugs.

"Sucks to be you right now," muttered Daffy.

"Supportive as always doc," Bugs murmured back.

Keith smiled. "I'll leave you guys to get to know each other a little," and he dashed off.

There was a short silence, until suddenly Coco snapped, "Right!" This startled Daffy and Bugs. "Daffy! You are dismissed! Bugs, I would like to speak with you alone!"

"See ya wouldn't wanna be ya," whispered Daffy cheekily as he gladly ran off.

The two bunnies glared at each other. Bugs nervously gulped.

"Now don't worry," began Coco. "I know I said I would kill you if I ever saw you again, but…I've changed my mind. I decided that would be too easy…instead, I'm going to make your life a living hell."

Bugs swallowed again. "And how exactly do you intend to do that?"

Coco laughed. "Well, considering I am your superior, I can get you to do whatever the hell I want, like...all this paper work that I have to do, which is currently lying on my desk in my office."

"What?" exclaimed Bugs. "I'm not your bitch!"

The female bunny smiled. "Oh but I think you'll find that you are! Otherwise you're fired!" Bugs wanted to hit her, but refrained himself. "Well…what are you waiting for? That paper work won't be done all by itself…off you go to my office," she demanded. This time, Bugs did not bother to protest; instead he reluctantly made his way to the director's office. "Oh and make me a coffee whilst you're at it!" she added.

She smiled deviously as she watched Bugs leave. "Oh why can't people understand, you should never mess with Coco Bunny!"

**END**


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